Red red wine

I am trying to switch from white wine to red and so far it's pretty successful. I've heard it's much healthier, less sugar, blah, blah, blah. Sounds good to me, I'm enjoying the switch so far. There is one problem though. Sometimes after a glass or two I start to look like I should be starring in a Twilight movie, maybe as the older aunt of Bella who is much more interesting than her(wow, is that possible??) and lives in an area of New Orleans where all the men with deep voices and good legs are disappearing slowly, but surely. I think I definitely have a type but never knew it up until a few years ago...That's an ode to my husband John. I never really knew how much I loved a deep voice until I met him. Sure I always loved actors like Javier Bardem and Casey Brown, not really realizing that their voices was the killer attraction....sometimes it takes me awhile. I always wondered what anyone saw in David Beckham..sure if you just saw his print ads, I could understand the mass appeal, yes I can :D. The problem is that I saw him in interview and it  totally ruined any kind of fantasy...I think my voice is deeper than his, sad but true.  He's up there with Pee Wee Herman(who I like for other reasons), but I digress.....
 What I was getting at with the Twilight reference was my teeth turning red as I imbibe the red wine(Australian red seems to be the worst offender). Pinot noir doesn't seem to be as bad as a merlot....I should become the first sommelier who rates wine for teeth colour. Wouldn't that be interesting, and helpful especially for those first dates, #1 being okay for first dates with minimal discolouration and #5 being better steer clear, what looked like sparkling pearly whites are now turning into "God, I guess she doesn't have a dental plan, how did I NOT notice her rotting teeth!!"
It could definitely be a deal breaker, but thankfully my husband knows all about my affliction and how a good brushing makes it all better in the morning.
Should just stick to my Kilkenney, my favourite winter brew, and new favourite for the summer Tennent's lager. This is my carefully thought out product placement that if I would be rewarded in any way for, well let's just say, that would be okay by me.
I'll talk about something more serious next time, like why should I break down and get the Brazilian, I always thought my good old Canadian bikini sugaring was okay by me, and downright Canadian.
Anyone out there want to convince me otherwise, be my guest.
Con ♥